Kintsugi living blog — stories

Making meaning out of suffering

Posted by Kenetha Stanton on

Making meaning out of suffering

© 2011 exezippdf, Flickr | CC-BY | via Wylio Part of being human seems to be the need to find meaning in the things that happen to us in life. Nowhere is this more true than when it comes to those things which cause us suffering. Most of us are desperate to find meaning in our suffering in the hope it will bring some alleviation of the depth of our suffering and pain. But in my experience it's never actually worked that way. Meaning is something that has grown out of the healing process, not something that causes the healing...

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Embracing groundlessness to avoid shattering

Posted by Kenetha Stanton on

Embracing groundlessness to avoid shattering

© 2010 janet galore, Flickr | CC-BY I've been rereading Pema Chödrön's When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times lately, and I've been particularly struck in this reading by her exploration of the ways in which we aggressively attempt to solidify our ego-selves when facing situations that cause us to feel that there is no solid ground under our feet. She claims that one of the key ways we attempt to create a sense of solidness in the face of the uncertainty of life is through aggressively stating and justifying our opinions. We make our opinions into absolute...

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Collapsing our stories to make space for healing

Posted by Kenetha Stanton on

Collapsing our stories to make space for healing

© 2015 Paul VanDerWerf, Flickr | CC-BY | via Wylio As humans, we are story-making creatures. We use stories to explain to ourselves and to others how the world works. They are our answers to the ubiquitous question of why. Why did this happen? Why does that person act that way? Why do I act the way I do? Why does this hurt? Why is the world the way it is? These stories make up our beliefs about our world and how the world operates, and they guide our reactions, our perceptions, and our decisions. Most of the time, though,...

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Rejecting false brokenness

Posted by Kenetha Stanton on

Rejecting false brokenness

© 2012 DonkeyHotey, Flickr | CC-BY | via Wylio There is an incredible amount of brokenness in our world. Broken hearts and broken lives abound all around us. And yet, we tend to heap a great deal of false brokenness onto that overwhelming pile, finding ourselves (and others) to be "broken" in places where no brokenness exists. Invariably these forms of false brokenness stem from comparing ourselves to others or to cultural standards of who we "should" be. When we perceive ourselves to be falling short, we conclude that we must be inherently broken in some way. This is false...

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