Kintsugi living blog — shadow

You are not who you think you are

Posted by Kenetha Stanton on

You are not who you think you are

© 2013 Ley, Flickr | CC-BY | via Wylio This phrase has been bouncing around inside my head for a couple of weeks now: you are not who you think you are. This may sum up one of the most profound things I learned during my experience of having my world fall apart. It is also among the profoundly beneficial things I learned. It is a big part of my gold. You see, very often the things that cause the greatest brokenness in our lives do so not only because of the grief of the actual loss or trauma we...

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Embracing groundlessness to avoid shattering

Posted by Kenetha Stanton on

Embracing groundlessness to avoid shattering

© 2010 janet galore, Flickr | CC-BY I've been rereading Pema Chödrön's When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times lately, and I've been particularly struck in this reading by her exploration of the ways in which we aggressively attempt to solidify our ego-selves when facing situations that cause us to feel that there is no solid ground under our feet. She claims that one of the key ways we attempt to create a sense of solidness in the face of the uncertainty of life is through aggressively stating and justifying our opinions. We make our opinions into absolute...

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What's your superpower?

Posted by Kenetha Stanton on

What's your superpower?

© 2014 John Hain, Flickr | CC-BY | via Wylio Do you know what your superpower is? If not, you're not alone. Few of us have stepped outside of the usual sway of self-criticism long enough to get in touch of our superpower. Nevertheless, we all have at least one. We all have at least one thing that we naturally bring to the world around us that makes the world a better place. The problem for many of us is that our superpower hides in places we never think to look. Here are three common places where unidentified superpowers hide....

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Declaring a truce with myself

Posted by Kenetha Stanton on

Declaring a truce with myself

Fighting Topis by Stuart Barr, on Flickr. Used via Creative Commons licensing. I have certain personality traits that make me a difficult person. These are things that people have been complaining about from my earliest memories, so it's not that I am unaware of them, and I even recognize how they make me difficult for other people to deal with. I've been actively fighting these particular traits and trying to change them for most of my life. That inner battle against these parts of myself has intensified through the years, but it's not making much difference. In fact, the harder...

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The shadow side of meaning

Posted by Kenetha Stanton on

Blame by !anaughty!, on Flickr. Used via Creative Commons licensing. Humans are meaning-making creatures. We want to know why things happen as they do. We want to know how to live better lives. We want to know how life works. Finding meaning in our lives is a necessary part of most of our journeys. It motivates us, it sustains us through difficult times, and it is an organizing principle in what often seems to be a chaotic world. We need meaning. But there is a shadow side to our hunt for meaning, too. What we really want most of the...

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